Tuesday, September 28, 2010

something is wrong with me.

I am in a very screwed-up emotional state right now. And I do not know why. I have slept on and off all day, which I am sure hasn't helped, plus I didn't go to work today either.

Plus, I drank some over the weekend in addition to my trip up to Massachusetts, so I'm thinking my body is shot both physically and mentally. So it might be time to concede that I am no longer a young man, and need to take care of myself more than I normally do. Also am wondering how much this mood I am in is an afteraffect of alcohol. I don't know. Anyway, work tomorrow, then music therapy, then PTSD meeting. So tomorrow is a packed day. Going to attempt to get good sleep tonight. How, I don't really know, but gonna try anyway.

I am worried that this mood will continue into the weekend, as I fly out on Sunday, and that's gonna make the start of this trip shitty.

Who am I kidding? I am so down right now that I have doubts about whether I should even go on this trip, let alone, do anything else.

Man I am FUCKED UP.

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